Weekend

Great weekend!!! Busy weekend!!!
Here are a few pictures.

Flying

I am deathly afraid to fly. I get so anxious that I start sobbing. It is pretty pathetic considering I am 35 years old. It is a control thing. Those that know me, know that I like to have a certain control over my life (or at least pretend to - ha!). So my cousin is getting married in a few weeks in California and I couldn't even make the flight arrangements. My brother Michael had to make my plane reservations for me. Every night since he made the reservations, I have been having nightmares about plane crashes. I have done the research and I know the odds of a plane crashing. Everyone makes fun of me and calls me names, but my fear is mine. I feel like I have so much to lose and I'm not ready to go yet... Some say that my fear is because I don't have a good relationship with God and I don't believe that if I did die that I would be in a better place. Which is somewhat true. The last time I flew was to Florida in Nov 2010 and I was crying when I got on the plane, showing everyone pictures of my kids. I am happy once I get to my destination and laugh at my ridiculousness. But getting there is another story... My fear is leaving the kids without a mother if anything were to happen. And my fear has gotten worse since having children. I can't just have a glass of wine to take the edge off. I have to take Ativan, sometimes Xanax and alcohol. Ugh, I was hoping to maybe see a hypnotist, to see if that would work. I just can't pinpoint when my fear got so bad. I need to stay positive and have a better attitude. Because like it or not, I will be flying into San Diego in a few weeks. I just hope I can sleep through the flight or pass out, blackout - I don't care. As long as we get there in one piece.

Baby Led Weaning/Solids- day 1

I have been doing a lot of research on BLW. Emma is now 6 months, and ready to start. So last night I put her in the high chair with just her diaper and a bib. And I placed 2 pieces of sliced avocado on her tray. She didn't "eat" that much. But she did try and put it in her mouth. She seemed interested.
We will try avocado again tonight and then we will move to bananas.

I have some videos to post, but will have to wait until tonight.

My life in sweatpants...

The past week has been tough on me...

I have been a little more of an emotional train wreck than normal:)  First, last Saturday I was down and out with strep throat.  That was HORRIBLE!  I couldn't swallow, breathe, could barely sit up.  I hate being sick, because I really don't get a chance to lie in bed and recover.  Daniel wasn't much help either.  He kept bringing me a screaming baby to feed, let the kids make the BIGGEST mess EVER!  He kept the older two outside, but there was so much that I needed to be done inside, that it just made me even more pissed that I was sick, but still had to empty the dishwasher, and do laundry.

My husband makes me so happy in a million different ways....BUT, helping out around the house is not one of them.  Sometimes I wish I could just let the toys and crap pile up, so he would trip over something in the middle of the night or he would see what would happen if I just let it all go.  I am so not designed to just let things go...I can't stand it when the kids take out more than one toy at a time.  I sometimes feel like I am the meanest mommy in the world because I want them to clean up, so I hide toys and put things away just so I don't have to do all the cleaning up.  Jake drives me INSANE!!!  Seriously, INSANE.  All he does is DUMP toys.  And, it drives me nuts!  Daniel doesn't care, he can be surrounded by toys and trash and it doesn't bother him...is it because he knows I can't stand it and I will not let it sit and fester.  I think I clean up toys about 50% of my day with the kids.  It is these days that I cannot wait to get back to work.

Another thing that is hard is that Daniel didn't even ask if I was okay last weekend.  He didn't come in to check on me to see if I needed anything.  Is my husband the only one who does this?  Is there some sensitivity training that he can attend or a normal husband that can talk some sense into him?  He finished the toilet paper in our bathroom, and I asked him to get some more and he made me feel like I was asking him to move a mountain.  I mean, seriously....and then he only brings ONE freaking roll, when our dispenser holds 5.  I mean, I just look at that as lazy!  Maybe he should have gone to military school.  Ugh...So, needless to say, I was  pretty much in tears all of Sunday and the majority of Monday.  And, then he doesn't want to talk about anything, and he definitely doesn't want to talk about anything in front of the kids...well, sorry, he isn't really helping me in that department either.  Lately, all he does is come home from work, eat dinner and then pass out on the recliner.  I can't remember the last time he went to bed in our bed.  This is NOT normal and I hate it.  So, he basically knows that I will make dinner, clean up dinner, bathe the kids and put them to bed all while trying to breastfeed a new baby...I mean, I know that I can handle a lot, but I thought this was a partnership.  Needless to say I had a meltdown on him on Sunday and Monday.  And, I am up half the night with Emma - either feeding her, changing her, making sure she is warm.

So, now I am trying to simplify my life by getting rid of the toys and crap that I don't need.  This is so hard for me...but hopefully my girlfriend Ellen or my friend Jen (who cleans my house) will be able to help me in the near future.

Anyway, that was my week this past week.  I actually put on jeans on Wednesday for Emma's newborn photo shoot and on Thursday to visit my coworkers.  But, the rest of the time I am running late and barely hanging on - dressed in sweatpants.  I should rename my blog - My Life in Sweats...because that is what I am usually dressed in.

Superbowl is this weekend.  I am rooting for the Giants.  I am starting Weight Watchers on Monday.  I have to find our scale so I can start weighing myself.  I would like to be back down to my lifetime weight by the time I go back to work.  I think I have 12 pounds to go...

I think my parents and I are going to help be each other's motivators.  It is easier to do it with someone, and Daniel will just lose weight by eating the dinners I cook.  Should be interesting!

Have a great weekend....sorry about the Debbie Downer post...but I needed to get somethings off my chest.

Emma's Birth Story

It was Saturday Jan 14th and I had a pretty ambitious day laid out for us.  There was so much that I wanted to get done before the 18th (scheduled induction day).  First was a trip to Ikea in College Park to pick up some dressers for the boys' room.  Then to pay my grandparents a visit (since they live right down the street from Ikea) and who knows when I would be able to get my act together after Emma was here to go visit them.  And, I hadn't seen them since Christmas Eve and I just wish I could see them more...

Anyway, Daniel thought I was crazy for wanting to go to Ikea on a Saturday, and he was right, it was a little overwhelming especially since I walked through every showroom and wanted to look at everything. Did i mention that Daniel stayed in the car since all three kids fell asleep???  So, it was me and 1000+ of my closest friends roaming Ikea.  I knew what I was in search of but of course would get side tracked in the picture frame and organizing sections.

After about 90 minutes, I was loaded upend in the check-out line when Daniel calls and says that Hank needs to use the potty.  So i leave my cart praying that no one takes it, I walk outside and as you can imagine Daniel is parked in the furthest spot away from the door where no other cars will come close to scratching our car (this is one thing I love and dislike at the same time about my honey).  So, I grab Hank and take him inside to use the facilities (of course, I have to go as well - and did I mention that I lost my mucous plug that morning???  Is that not the grossest word ever???)  Hank then helps me check-out and by this time, it has been 2 hours that Daniel has been in the car, so he is eager to leave Ikea and get to my grandparents house to eat and then go home, watch some football and fall asleep.

So, we get to my grandparents house and sit down and eat, then I start to not feel so good.  I feel a little nauseous.  Then I feel like I have to go to the bathroom.  I come back to the table and I just feel like something is off.  I then feel the need to run to the bathroom and I get sick...I feel like the baby is coming out.  So, we quickly gather the kids (luckily my parents are also at my grandparents house as well and they help get everyone in our car.)  Mom takes dad home, switches cars, and meets us at the hospital.  Michael and Katie get a phone call and they also meet us at the hospital to take our car and kids home, Katie then brings our little car back to us, so Daniel has a way to get home later on that night (after we have Emma).

I call the doctor on the way to the hospital and I'm not having regular contractions, but my water might have broken or I might have peed myself (which is not an uncommon thing in pregnancy).  I have the on-call schedule for my doctor's office and I know that Dr. Penn is on call on the 14th, and he is one of my favorite doctor's at my practice.  He delivered Jake.  So, we get to the labor and delivery floor and I get checked into the Triage.  Dr. Penn checks me and I am only 3.5cm, water not broken and I am not contracting regularly.  They are going to let me walk around for about an hour to see if there is any cervical change to indicate that I am in labor.  I have never been into labor without pitocin before, so this is all new to me.  So, instead of walk...I am doing squats, I am skipping, I am doing jumping jacks, anything to make my cervix CHANGE!!!  The deep squats seem to be the most effective.  I was literally sweating...I hadn't worked out this hard in 9 months.  So, around 9pm, Dr. Penn checks me again, and I am only at 4cm, but still not contracting AT ALL!  So, I ask him to strip my membranes.  This is the worst pain ever.  It feels like he is jamming his hand up there so far and then trying to stretch everything out.  It was horrible...but it WORKED!  I started having all kinds of contractions...and they were strong and regular.  Oh, also, during my walking around, Daniel went down to the lobby to find a TV and watch the end of the 49ers/Saints game and the Patriots/Broncos game.  So, my mom got to the hospital and she kept me company until the football games were over.  There was no TV in the triage room...so Daniel wanted to be admitted so he could watch the games...nice, right???  Anyway, when the contractions started, they were painful so I would make some noises and my mom would tell me to breathe...I know she was trying to help, but I just wanted them to go away...all I kept thinking was, can I be admitted so I can get my epidural, please???  So, around 10pm, Dr. Penn came in and said I was at 5cm, we were getting admitted and we were gonna have a baby!  Woo hoo!

At 10:30, I was wheeled into a L&D room, I had the nicest nurse, she was awesome.  She called for the anesthesiologist who was amazing.  I have both of their names written down somewhere, I just need to find it.  The anesthesiologist sort of messed up my epidural.  He said that my back didn't have very much fat on it (which he kept saying was a good thing) but that it did make it a little tougher for him to get the catheter in to my back.  He had to do the epidural twice and said I may get a spinal headache a day or two after giving birth.  My good friend Dana had one of these before so I knew it would be awful if I did get a headache.  Anyway, he hooked me up.  The nurse told me that by getting the epidural, it might slow my contractions down (which it did.)

At around 2:30am, the nurse checked my cervix and said I was still at 4cm.  The next time I saw Dr. Penn he came in and broke my water (at 3am).  My nurse came back in around 3:45 and I told her that I didn't think the epidural was working, because I kept pressing the button and nothing was happening.  I was feeling ALL the contractions.  She checked me, said I was at 9cm and she quickly started getting things together.  She called Dr. Penn.  I had to wake Daniel up...I had to yell at him 3 times to get him out of bed.  Then he wanted to brush his teeth and I almost kicked him out of the room.  I said (probably screamed at him) "There is no time to brush your teeth!!!"  Dr. Penn and the nurse got everything together VERY quickly and at 4am, I was crying due to the pain, and I said to Dr. Penn - this baby is coming out NOW!  They got my legs in the stirrups or whatever they are called.  Daniel and the nurse pulled my legs back toward me and I pushed once to get her head out, and then one more time for her body.  At 4:10am, Emma was here!!!  They gave her right to me and Dr. Penn had to run to deliver another baby, but he came back shortly thereafter!  It was quite the experience.

Emma was so pink and had the darkest hair and A LOT of it!  She was 7 pounds, 6.8oz.  She was 19.25" long.  She was gorgeous!  They gave her to me right away and she started eating!  Then she went to sleep for a while.  

Teresa took her kids down to NC on Friday for the long weekend.  We called them Saturday and told them we were on our way to the hospital.  We weren't sure if we were going to be admitted, so we called them when she was born and my in-laws came to the hospital the next day.

It was Sunday, and I had the spinal headache already...I was so exhausted because I didn't get any sleep the night before.  Michael was GREAT!  When Daniel got home in the morning, Michael took the three kids to his house, so Daniel could get some sleep.  Then, Michael and Daniel came to the hospital with the kids so they could meet their new baby sister.  This was the best part...the kids (Elli and Hank) were OVER THE MOON!  They wanted to hold her and pass her back and forth to each other, it was so sweet.  Elli ended up spending the day in the hospital room with me.  She took a shower with me and everything...I can never get a shower by myself.  I felt a little better in the afternoon and my friend Siobhan came to visit - she brought the yummiest brownies - so good!  My in-laws came, my grandparents, my dad.  It was great to see everyone.

On Monday, I was ready to go home.  I just wanted to get home and sleep in my own bed without being poked or prodded.  So, after they did all Emma's checks, I lied about not having a headache (so I could get out of there) and we were discharged!  Thank goodness my mom stayed over to help me the next few days.  I really did not feel great.  And, Teresa helped out with Elli, Hank and Jake taking them overnight on Tuesday night.  It was weird just having the baby to watch on Tuesday night.

ANyway, this is really long and I think I am going to stop writing.  The delivery was great, the nurses were awesome and I absolutely love Chesapeake Women's care and Dr. Penn!

My 91 and 94 year old grandparents

 4 generations

Proud siblings

Taking Emma Home

All the Oxendine Cousins

Okay, as I type this, I am 37 weeks pregnant with baby #4...I am so over this pregnancy.  I go to the doctor once a week now and I was already measuring 1cm dilated last week.  I hope there is some progress this week when I go.  I need to start getting out and walking...

Here are my stats from last week - 36 weeks:

Weight: +22 lbs

BP: 101/72 (which is a little high for me)

Baby's HR: 138

Everything is on track for me to have another induction the week of January 17th...at least that is what I am planning.

The holidays were CRAZY!!! We didn't leave the state of Maryland, but managed to travel all over or so it felt.  I felt terrible the whole time and eventually went to the doctor on Monday, the 26th.  Upper respiratory infection - awesome!  Elli then came down with something the week after Christmas - just a virus...

I am now in organizing and simplifying mode - getting rid of all my tupperware (especially the ones with mismatched lids - there is nothing more annoying to me).  I got new pots and pans for Christmas so I am recycling my old ones...I hope you can recycle them - they are in the yellow bins...we'll see if they take it later this week...

Christmas decorations, tree, etc came down after our last Christmas celebration on the 27th, then I got a bug up my butt to sort and organize the kids toys.  We have too much crap.  I need to donate 50% of what we have...it is so hard though...maybe this will be a spring cleaning effort.  

My goals for this new year start with financial stuff - get my financial house in order and get rid of my one credit card...it is annoying that I carry a balance and I really need to get serious about getting rid of it.  I have been following a lot of money saving mom blogs, and hopefully they will give me a jump start and motivation to follow through.  It will be tough for the 6 weeks where I am not working...and our maternity leave plan SUCKS...it isn't a maternity leave plan, it is short term disability and it is just crap.  I love my company (well, I love the people that I work with) but the benefits are not that awesome when it comes to maternity leave...I will keep harping on the President until he fires me or until he retires...

Packing my bag for the hospital - this has been quite a challenge for me.  I think because I am just lazy right now and I keep putting it off because I know that I will probably have to be induced and it will be a night before I am scheduled to have the baby.  The problem is that with my last pregnancies it was always hot out, so I didn't need to really bring anything EXTRA.  This time it will be freezing out and I just feel a little unprepared.  Oh well, my strategy is LESS is MORE.  As long as I can take the laptop and get a connection at the hospital, all will be fine.  I will only be there for a day or two...

I installed the car seat this morning, after washing everything so it smells wonderful!  It will be weird to have 4 car seats in our suburban.  We will no longer be able to take the camry anywhere - for emergency cases, we were able to fit 3 car seats in the camry by slamming the doors shut, but not anymore...no room for 4!

Jake started his new "structured" playgroup this morning.  It is a one-on-one intense learning environment.  He cried the almost the whole time he was there.  The poor guy, in the past month, he has been to a neurologist, he has seen a sensory specialist, Thursday he is having his hearing checked, and we are still waiting on confirmation back from Kennedy Krieger to see if they will schedule us an appointment at their Center for Autism Related Disorders.  The structured playgroup is a free program offered by our county infants and toddlers program.  I love the county program and have been very satisfied with them so far.  Jake is 27 months old and not talking.  He babbles, but he doesn't say "Mama" or "Dada" or "Baby" - none of the words he is "supposed" to be able to say around the 12-15 month range.  So, he will go 3 days a week for 90 minutes each day to be seen by an Occupational Therapist, a Speech Pathologist and a Sensory Specialist.  We have been doing a lot with the sensory "diet" and he seems to be comprehending things more now, but not vocalizing anything...so, I hope this playgroup helps him.  They thought he might be on the Autism Spectrum, and they might still think this.  But, I had him evaluated by Dr. Marc Disabella from Children's Hospital and he said he thinks he just has a developmental speech delay.  More to follow on his progress later.  He is such a sweet boy.

Hank is just as lovey as ever.  He does this "thing" where he kisses my whole face.  He kisses my eyes, both of my cheeks, my chin, my forehead, my nose, and my lips and he is just so freaking adorable.  It just melts my heart.  I hope he always does this to me.  He also tells everyone all the time that he loves them...could there be anything more sweet???

Elli is also doing extremely well.  She was very interested in where Santa lives and why we celebrate Christmas and how old is Jesus?  She is so cute and in this questioning sort of phase right now.  She is also goofy as ever.  

Anyway, this is a long overdue update...

Did I say that I am DONE with this pregnancy???  Who knows maybe I will go into labor naturally???  Ha!!!

32 weeks

It has been a very busy December already!
I had my 32 week appointment last week, here are my stats!
+21 pounds
86/55
baby HR: 155 - she had the hiccups when the doctor did the heartbeat.

We had our first annual Gillespie Girls cookie making party on Sunday.  It was such a great idea and so much fun to get together with the relatives before Christmas (even if it was only the girls). 

Then my week got off to a pretty rough start.  Jake started throwing up everywhere Monday afternoon.  I was helping sort the Mickman's fundraiser products and as we were about to leave, he started throwing up all over himself.  Poor baby...
Well it is Wednesday and I still had to take him back to the doctor this morning.  Ugh, I guess it is that time of year.  Luckily, his fever finally went down today and he is acting a little more like himself and not just a walking zombie.  I was worried last night when he wouldn't do anything but lie on the floor with his eyes open - very scary.

Army-Navy is this weekend and I really don't know if I feel like going.  I have organized a limo bus and have a TON of food to prepare, but I might just send Daniel with the food...I don't know...

Anyway, that is it for right now...I know, short posts as of late.

I have a lot of stuff going on with Jake right now and the first is his neurologist appointment on Friday.  Luckily, someone canceled so we don't have to wait until February to see the doctor from Children's hospital.

Slacker...I know...

So, I have been meaning to just write small posts on the past two weeks...but, sadly, those weeks have come and gone.

24 week appointment was great - I only had Elli and Jake with me and we were in and out within 20 minutes.  I love those appointments.

Stats are:  Weight - 13 pounds gained so far (not bad considering the 2nd and 3rd pregnancies), BP: 95/62, BHR: 150, measuring fine.  I finally started wearing maternity clothes to work...I had to break down and buy some:( 

We had the boys' birthday party since I last posted and I am sure that I will eventually get around to downloading the pictures and posting a few.  The problem is that we are running out of room on our macbook, and although I have an external hard drive, and have transferred and backed everything up, I am deathly (DEATHLY!) afraid to delete any pictures.  Documents, downloads, stuff like that = no problem deleting.  In fact, I think I may have deleted some important things in the past, but pictures, no way.  Music - my husband would kill me.  So, how do I deal with this.  I keep getting an error saying that my start up disc is full!!!  I think we need a bigger MAC and I just need to convince my hubby to do it!

So, until I get around to either getting some help at the apple store or convincing my hubby that we need a new computer, the pictures will probably stay on my camera, because I am deathly afraid to delete anything.  I laugh at myself because anyone who is more computer savvy than I would not let this slow them down. 

I also had a mole removed on my face a few weeks back and I am so glad that I went to a plastic surgeon rather than a dermatologist.  I have a tiny little scar that will probably go away.  At my appointment, I discussed laser hair removal and botox.  Both of which I just want to get more information on.  When I told people at work, they looked at me as if I had 3 heads. 

Laser hair removal is something that I will consider after Baby Emma is here, because I am just getting really lazy the older I get.  I barely shave my legs and underarms let alone other unmentionable places...but it is for me, because God knows Daniel could care less.  Ha!  That just makes me laugh...thank goodness I married a man who just lets me be me.  He doesn't make snide comments about my appearance.  In fact, when he sees me in my bra and undies, he cat calls at me and he means it.  That makes me feel good because when I look in the mirror, I don't really LOVE my ever growing belly...but he can't seem to keep his hands off...:)  Love him for that. 

It was Daniel's birthday this past weekend.  Before I tell you what we (me and the kids gave him) as presents...he had a boys' weekend away the weekend prior - so in my opinion that is present enough, but I had the kids make him cards and they loved doing this.  Then, we gave him a gift card and a pair of Under armour pants that I got on sale at the outlet last week.  He also mentioned that he wanted a jacket - but he is going to have to try that on himself and tell me what size and which jacket to get.  But, we did have an adult night out with some friends on Saturday.  I haven't laughed so hard in a long time.  Seriously, every time I get together with the "W" girls (&J) I have so much fun!!!  Poor "J" was the only guy at our table, so he had to hear some TMI information that I am sure he would have rather skipped.  A good time was had by all and we brought the party back to our house where I hear the guys were up until past 2am sucking down the JD & Cokes...

Anyway, I wanted to get something on the blog this week, so I didn't feel like a total slacker.  Kids' school is going great.  I am really loving the Co-op that Elli is attending.  I just wish it was longer than 2.5 hours.  I feel as if I drop her off and 5 minutes later I am picking her up again.  Ugh, such is life. 

That is it for now, I will try and add some more fun stories from this weekend later on...

Happy Monday!

Week 22

So, I have been feeling great lately.  I have gotten a lot more energy.  I started cooking again...(like I said earlier that my husband knows he gets cereal for dinner when I am in my first trimester...this pregnancy, it lasted a little longer since I was so sick.)  I have been trying to keep up with blog posts, work, keeping the house clean, the kids school schedules/projects, Elli's dance class, Jake's speech therapy play group (more on this in a minute), planning birthday parties, helping with the community association, laundry, etc....wow, that's exhausting just thinking about my growing to-do list! 

So, a few weeks ago, I had my 20 week sonogram.  I had it at 18 weeks, we found out we are having a girl...but we didn't get any good face pictures and more importantly for the doctors - they didn't get to see the heart.  So, I have a cardiac sonogram tomorrow.  The good news is that I have been feeling much better about the baby.  I have started to feel some consistent movement...but here is what I wrote a few weeks ago.  I was going to submit this to BabyCenter, but I thought it was too dreary and down...

Why am I nervous?

I am 20 weeks pregnant and have felt very little movement.  I think or I know, rather, that I drive myself crazy.  I don't know what goes on up in my head that the older I get, the more I worry.  I let all the little things worry me that didn't before.  I have 3 healthy children, I started off this pregnancy being very healthy, I had just lost 40 pounds, we eat lots of whole grains, fruits and vegetables, and my yearly physical exam was great.  My mother had a miscarriage at 26 weeks; needless to say, she had to have a DNC.  I always seem to hold my breath up until that point.  And, I don't really get EXCITED about the current pregnancy for fear of losing the baby.  Fear of growing attached and then being completely devastated or worse – heartbroken.  I had a girlfriend who recently lost a baby at 16 weeks.  At my ultrasound at 18 weeks, I saw the baby, we heard the heartbeat, and the tech said the baby was moving a lot.  So, why don't I feel it?  I haven't gained that much weight, they couldn't see the 4 chambers of the heart, and these are the things I worry about.  It feels like an eternity since my last appointment.  4 weeks is now an eternity.  I lie on my side and try to feel something…but I don't.  Am I just crazy???

But, while I will still hold my breath until after 26 weeks, I am feeling much much better.  At my last appointment I scheduled 3 or 4 appointments down the road and at the end, we were already into December and at the 2 week interval appointments...crazy.

The good news is that fall is here and now I can start wearing leggings and jeans, I love fall...I do not love the freezing cold, but jeans and a sweatshirt is my combo!  Also, I have YET to have to switch to maternity clothes.  I wore my size 8 old navy jeans this past weekend...that has got to be a record for me.  I know with the boys I think I had to buy size 12 or even 14 just so my muffin top wouldn't hang over :(  So, I am hoping I don't gain too much more weight (although I've only gained about 8 pounds so far...)  Fingers crossed...less I gain, less I will have to lose.

Let me talk about the kids...

Jake - ugh, his first speech therapy playgroup with Miss Kandy was horrible.  He cried the ENTIRE time.  So much that she told me to just take him home.  Poor guy...I think it is because we are at the church and everytime we drop him off at the church daycare, he cries until he falls asleep.  He is having some serious separation issues at that church.  Later on in the day, when I dropped him off at Miss Kirby's house while I went and helped at Elli's school, he was totally fine, happy as a clam, didn't even look back at me. 

Hank - he is a trooper right now.  He says the funniest things to me and mimicks me, it is too hysterical.  When I get upset with him about something he did, he has this devilish look and he tell me it was an accident.  I know those big brown eyes and dimples are going to help me to enable him down the road...I just know it.

Elli - she had her second dance class this week at SBe Dance Company.  Sabrina Koepke Benko is the owner.  I went to HS with her and she is actually Elli's teacher.  Daniel took her last night, but me, my mom and Daniel made her show us her moves when she got home and I have to say that it was quite hilarious to watch Daniel try and do ballet moves.  So adorable:)  I should have video-taped it.  Next time...

We had a big weekend last weekend - our anniversary, Cousin Aiden's 4th birthday party down in BFE, Virginia, Becky's surprise birthday party on Sunday with a big Redskins win (woo hoo!)!! 

Anyway, hope everyone has a great week.  DADT is now non-existent and I say thank goodness!  It is about time!  I hope that those still serving can get some peace and their partners get some benefits now.  It is ridiculous that Clinton's policy was in place for so long...

TTFN!

xo,

Kristen

10 years ago...

It was a Tuesday morning and my ship, USS David R. Ray, was somewhere out in the Pacific off the coast of South America.  We didn't get that great satellite service, but somehow we got a message through message traffic that the U.S. was under attack.  We turned the TV on and me and a few others sat in disbelief watching the first tower on fire.  Then, we saw live the second plane hit the second tower.  It was unreal and very hard to believe.

I was on my second ship, USS Lassen, during the 1-year anniversary of 9-11-01, and I remember the XO, CDR Tom Druggan (who was at the Pentagon during the attack the year prior) on the 1MC.  I think I was on watch at the time, so I was on the bridge wing.  I remember him choking up giving a remembrance announcement.  This day has always been very emotional for every American.

I look down at my daughter and she asks why I have tears in my eyes.  Do I tell her what horrific thing happened to the USA 10 years ago???  I want to shield her and my boys from the possibilities of evil and raise them to be non-judgemental people with open hearts and open minds.  Do I tell them what is significant about this day?  Do I tell them of the loved ones lost?  Of the almost 3000 people who died in the twin towers, pentagon and Shanksville?  It is a tough decision for me, as a parent. 

So, I am taking her with me to volunteer at the Heroes 9-11 run today.  I will try and hold back tears, because nothing happened to me or my family, but it is hard not to think of the possibilities of some evil people out there...I try not to think about what if...it's hard.

Anyway, today is also my sister-in-laws birthday, and we try and focus on more positive things and to teach our children about duty, courage, respect for others and love of country.  We are proud to be Americans. 

Dance Party 9-2-11

I recently got a new video camera.  I, honestly, have the worst voice...but the kids are hilarious.  They have a toy that plays music and Elli and Hank are too funny with their dance moves.  They freeze when the music stops...so I am sharing.  Hope this makes your Friday a little brighter:)

So long ago, I used to blog...

I know, I know...I feel like I am always starting off by saying sorry for being away so long...well it should come to no surprise that I have been on a bit of a hiatus.  Well, I'm back!  I am going to TRY to make an entry every week...emphasis on the word TRY!  It has been a crazy spring and summer.  For those of you that might not be aware, I am knocked up again...yes, this is the worst pregnancy ever, which means she (yes, it's a girl - Emma Riis) will be the best baby EVER, right???  I was so sick in June and July...I could barely get myself out of bed to get the kids to all their activities...seriously, while I was on the Zofran, I would literally hand Elli the iPad (the boys were napping) and I would take a little snooze myself, sometimes Elli took a nap with me...but most of the time she was playing Angry Birds...The kids are OBSESSED with that game so much that I have had to mute the iPad so I don't hear the music.

After we got back from NC for 4th of July and the kids were crazy around the pool, I immediately enrolled them in swimming lessons.  My friend Brady, 9to5mom, already had her kids going to see this lady Brooke Moore who does small groups of 4-5 kids per swim session.  The kids love it, NOW!  Hank who is my fearless swimmer didn't like it the first time, but he has gotten better each lesson.  The lessons are $35 for each kid...which is a little on the steep side (I think).  But, then again, hopefully if there is ever an incident at the pool, hopefully my kids won't drown.  Elli is such a good swimmer now, she is even doing a 4-year-old version of freestyle. 

I keep trying to think about how old I was when I went swimming for the first time and I know that I was young, because my brothers and I were POOL RATS for almost every summer possible.  What good times.  I remember Michael and I riding our bikes to Clemens Crossing pool for our swim team.  Michael was really good at swimming-bringing home 1st and 2nd place finishes, while I was more of a 7th place finisher.  I remember 7th because it was a marroon type ribbon...not very pretty.  But, swim team was fun and it seemed like everyone I ever knew was on a team. 

School is about to start for Elli and Hank.  Elli is going to 2 schools - Little Puddle Jumpers and then she will also be going to the local Co-Op where she will go to school with kids she will attend Kindergarten.  First, they had Elli in the wrong class.  The school membership person, I was initially not impressed with...because it took 3 emails and a few phone calls to get her to respond to me.  I guess I expect that people check their email at least once a day...is that too much to ask?  Even on vacation, I have my BB with me.  So, I went to orientation last night and to be honest, I left in tears.  Mostly because of the horomones that I am experiencing now, but I also left with a sense of "Oh my goodness, how am I going to be able to swing this?"  I think I must have been the only parent there that was freaking out.  I have 3 kids, 1 on the way, my oldest is 4.  "How am I going to do this???"  I don't think anyone else would understand what is going on in my head.  Daniel's response was, "then don't do it."  That is not what I want to hear.  I will make it work.  I always seem to make it work...or at least I like to pretend that I do:)  Then....every parent gets assigned a JOB on top of the helping with the teacher in the classroom.  And, yup, I got fundraising.  My first thought was ugh...I liked the program because if you didn't want to fundraise, you could write a check throughout the school year (which I totally plan on doing).  I did so many fundraisers when I was younger, I am not looking to do this again.  And, at 4-years-old...um....it's just going to be ME doing the fundraising.  At least I can buy the family some Joe Corbi's pizza kits for old time sake because Yup, that is our first fundraiser - woo hoo!  But, my attitude about the fundraising changed quickly after talking to Beth.  She seemed so pleasant and she was very reassuring that it wasn't that bad...we'll see...when they need me to be somewhere and I have to drag my pregnant ass and my 3 crazy kids...we'll see...I have to change my attitude and I will.  I was just stressed and the President was going so fast through all the material.  She just seemed really disorganized and crazy...on top of that some lady brought her kid who was such a distraction, he was playing with some game boy or something, um hello lady, you aren't supposed to bring your kid!!! 

So, luckily, when our power was out on Sunday morning and my neighbor, Holly, was looking for coffee (and thanks to our generator, we had coffee), Holly came in with her daughter and we ended up talking about my situation.  She takes her daughter to a young lady and today I made the phone call that has changed my whole perspective.  I CAN make this work and I will be a co-op'ing parent. 

This weekend we have an action packed weekend...Friday we have Deb Landon's Birthday Party - I hope that I look as young as she does at 29!  I cannot wait.  The Landon's are always so much fun!!!  Then the first Navy game of the season...AND, my parents are taking the kids to the Bowie Baysox game (ALL of the kids!!!)  I think they are glutton for punishment because then dad wants to come down and take the kids fishing and crabbing on Sunday.  Wow!  I will almost feel like I only have one kid (DANIEL)!  Ha ha ha!!!

Friday will also be a bittersweet day for me - Kandy is coming to do her final evaluation and close-out with Hank.  He is officially getting the boot from the Infants and Toddlers program.  But, Jake is just starting so I won't be missing Miss Kandy for long...She is an amazing person and teacher.  I am so fortunate to have her help me with the boys.  It gets me all emotional just talking about her, because if you could just see the difference in Hank that 1 year has made...it is amazing!  And, I have to give Hank credit too!  He is such a trooper.

Alright, look at this entry, huh!!!

I think this is a good start!  I will make another entry next week (I hope:)

TTFN!

--

Baby Showers, Soccer for Elli and Hank and Spring

I am so ready for warmer weather...I just ordered some new shorts and I can't wait to wear them...
I can't even begin to wrap my head around the fact that it is the end of March, already...April is a big month for us - Elli and Hank start soccer next Saturday, we are pretty excited!  I hope they enjoy it!


I have had 2 baby showers already and one more to go.  Two more of my friends (with girls around Elli's age) are pregnant with boys!

Good morning!

It's Sunday...I finally went to the doctor on Friday, saw Dr. K at Harbor and she put me on an antibiotic.  I love her, wish I didn't have to drive 45 minutes to get to her.  Oh well...I talked to her about getting the IUD taken out.  Then I talked to Katie, my SIL, who is a nurse, about what BC to be on...because I am DEFINITELY not ready to get pregnant again right now.  I love the paraguard because of it's end result, but I dread getting my period every month because I am doubled over in pain, and the bleeding is out of control.  NEVER have I bled so much.  I talked to my OB and they said that is one of the side effects.  Ugh....it's been a year and I think I am DONE with it.  Also, my period lasts for 6-7 days....such a pain.
So, Katie suggested that I do the Nuva-Ring.  I have already tried pills and I can't remember to take them...I know it sounds silly, but I forget and then I'm screwed.  So, I need something that is sort of mindless.  Next time, after we have our 4th, I am getting the Mirena.  I heard that you barely get a period.  But, it has hormones and I don't know how my body will react.  Will I be more crazy than I already am?  Decisions, decisions, but, I am definitely calling this week to get my IUD out!!!  If anyone has any other suggestions, I would LOVE to hear it.  We/I are planning on trying to get pregnant in May/June....I want to have the 4th by the time I'm 35.  And then I think we are done.  We can adopt a child or sponsor a million mids, but I just don't want to be pregnant anymore...

Anyway, we had a great time yesterday at our nephew, Matthew's, 5th birthday bowling party.  The kids, Elli and Hank, love love loved to bowl.  I just wish they had the duck pins...we will have to take them again to go duck pin bowling.  We were home around 6pm and Hank and Jake went to sleep right away.  Daniel and I watched, It's Complicated with Meryl Streep, Steve Martin, and Alec Baldwin - it was pretty funny.  Daniel didn't complain too much but he demanded the remote after it was over:)

We are hoping to get to visit with Santa today.  We were supposed to have the Fox's over for the Redskins game, but with me being sort of sick, I didn't want to even take the chance of passing anything onto Samuel (their 5 week old baby).  So, we postponed that for another time.  We need to have more Redskins parties!!!  And, we need to have more sleepovers with friends and family....before I get pregnant again:( 

Alright, the kids have really gone all out to make a HUGE mess of the playroom and their bedrooms, so I will be putting the house back together today!!!

Happy Thanksgiving!!!

It is the Saturday after Thanksgiving and almost all of my Christmas cards are in the mail, the tree is up and decorated, our blow-ups are up and the kids are loving them, Happy (our elf on the shelf) came last night and the kids found him this morning.  I already overheard Elli talking to him this morning....so sweet!  If you have kids and want to start a really sweet tradition, I highly recommend this....I love reading the story to my kids.  I also LOVE LOVE LOVE the Fisher-Price Little People Nativity Set that I bought last year on Black Friday.   The kids love it and I love telling them the story of how Christmas started. 


So, I did Black Friday shopping this year again....but up here, usually I go with my SIL and MIL when we are in North Carolina.  I got up around 2:45am, hit Kohl's at 3am, Target at 4am, Walmart at 5:15am and Kmart on the way home around 6:30am.  Kmart in Edgewater was the most enjoyable experience.  No lines, no crazy people (like there were at Walmart) and I just had a great morning.

I got presents for all of my favorite little girls....they had Barbie dolls for $5...and now that Aunt Katie gave Elli her first Barbie, that is all she has been asking for:)

She also loves anything Dora related.  Someone gave Hank or Jake (I can't remember) this awesome reader for a birthday and the kids LOVE it.  I am trying to find more little books for it...

We had such a great time at my aunt and uncles on Thursday.  I made my WW stuffing and it was okay.  It seemed as if I was the only person to try it....oh well.

I feel so relaxed and not stressed since we didn't drive to NC.  I know Daniel misses the fattening food....but I don't miss the drive or the kids horrible sleeping schedules and the lack of bedrooms/beds for everyone.

Anyway, we went over to Megan and Jeremy's last night...ate so much food and provided free birth control!  We had such a good time and it was so good to see the newlyweds.

Today we are going over to Michael and Katie's, once again providing free birth control!  ha!  I'm going to make candied sweet potatoes and roasted brussel sprouts!!!

Daniel and I are going to the skins game tomorrow.  It is going to be a little chilly, but I'm super excited!!!  That's it for now!

xo,
Kristen

Almost done!

So, I am almost all done with my Christmas cards...I stayed up last night making labels to put on the back of the envelope with the address of our/my blog.  I used to do a Christmas letter and LOVE reading everyone else's...really, I love getting the Christmas cards with letters...but I think that the blog serves as a year-long letter and since I am not as diligent as I should be there aren't that many posts:)

Well it has been about 3 weeks since my last update and LOTS has been going on.  Jake has started walking....he is still my little peanut, but he is getting to be a big boy.  Hank had his 6 month evaluation with the Infants and Toddler Program (ITP).  And, Elli had her first birthday party at Chuck E Cheese.  Daniel and I got away for a few days (sans kids thanks to my MIL) to Florida to see Megan Welsh and Jeremy Chayer tie the knot in Fort Lauderdale.  It was SOOOO so so so much fun!  I have LOTS of pictures, and luckily I brought my camera to piece together the nights that were a little fuzzy:)

The weight loss is going great - I hit 36 pounds and am not really TRYING to lose anymore...but would like to get down to 140, which is a few more pounds away.  I am really happy where I am now, but I am stuck on that stupid number.  ugh!  I am going to try a low fat stuffing to bring to Thanksgiving dinner....I want to try it out first here though....we'll see how that goes!  I love stuffing and I LOVE it when it cooks in the bird, but that is the fattest way to cook it:(

This year for Thanksgiving, we are staying here.  We usually make the trek down to Lumberton, NC to Daniel's parents house, but this year is my Godfather, Uncle Diz's, 60th birthday on Thanksgiving Day.  And, our family (mom's side) has strayed away from getting together on Thanksgiving because everyone is all over the place and everyone has done their own thing, so it's nice that we will all be together - even Brendan is coming into town from LA and bringing Jess!!!   I love my in-laws dearly, but wish they didn't live so far away.
When it was just Daniel and I - it was no big deal....but now it is so stressful for me and then the sleeping arrangements when we get there are not ideal and I am moody.  The kids don't sleep well because there are 3 other kids and people up at all hours.  So, it hurts me to say that my stress level is zero right now.  I can get all the Christmas decorations out and put the tree up and start decorating on Friday and Saturday.  I am pretty excited for this Holiday Season!!! 

Happy, our Elf on the Shelf, comes back on Friday and I am so excited because every year the kids understand a little more.  It also makes me a little sad that they are growing up.  Life is just too short and goes by in the blink of an eye. 

Black Friday - I'm thinking of going....but I need a plan and I need a specific list of things to get for people and a specific budget.  The townhouse is still vacant, so I need to get that rented ASAP...

Hope everyone has a good week.   I am working Tuesday, Wednesday and Friday (from home).  Have a great Thanksgiving!!!

xo,
Kristen

October - where did it go???

So, it is October 21st and seriously, where does time go?  We have had a very very busy October so far.  Starting off we had the boys' combined birthday party which was AWESOME!!!  We knew we were having live animals come out to the house, but Little Barnyard Buddies brought ALL their animals for the kids (and adults) to play with, pet, and even decorate.  It was so much fun and I just want to give a big shout out to the owner, Cindy Jimenez (which turns out she is a mother of 5 and her hubby went to USNA).

Then I was SUPPOSED to host a baby shower for my friend, Emma, but she had the baby the day before the shower - no, I'm not kidding!  She had a beautiful healthy baby girl and she named her Isabelle Edith Martin.  We were so thrilled for her and Doug.

So, since we didn't have the baby shower, we decided to go to the Hank Williams Jr. concert at the Patriot Center that night and we went with my brother, Michael and his wife, Katie, my sister-in-law Teresa and her husband Stuart.  A good time was had by all...a little too good of a time:)  Both of my brothers' and Daniel's birthday are all within one week, so we did that for Michael's birthday.  The following Monday, October 11th we went to the Caps game.  It was my first professional hockey game and it was awesome!  Butch, Stuart's dad, gave us the tickets and we had a blast!

The next weekend on the 16th we went to Old Stein Inn for Daniel's birthday.  A few friends and family joined us and we ate SO much, but it was SO good. 

Lately, I have been going on this website called www.laaloosh.com - a friend at work, Abigail, recommended it.  The owner of the website is also a weight watcher and she experiments with different recipes.  Everything that we have tried so far has been AWESOME!!!  So, let's hope that it helps as the weather gets colder and all I want is pasta, carbs and fattening (Cream-based) soups!

Speaking of weight....ugh, I have been hovering around the 147-148 mark...which is fine, I would be happy at this weight....BUT, I am obsessed with the number 140.  And, I have no idea why??? 

After all the showers, I opened up my own Etsy shop to sell the cake pops, cupcake pops, oreo truffles, and I am also going to try brownie pops this weekend.  I haven't gotten any hits yet, but maybe when the holidays start approaching.

Holidays - I have already started shopping for the kids - I PRE-ordered Toy Story 3 from Walmart's website.  It was only $16, so I am sure it will probably be a HOT item this year.  It will be hard for me to hold off until Christmas, but I have the will power (I think...:)

I am going to Virginia Beach this weekend for my girlfriend Andrea's baby shower.   She is also having a girl in December.  Her husband, Josh (one of my best friends from NAPS) is a SEAL deployed to Afghanistan.  I think of Josh almost daily and hope that he is okay.  I have heard that they (SEALS) have been very busy...

Well, I am excited to get a night's sleep without a toddler on top of me, or kicking me or asking me for juice, water, etc.  And, the shower is at a wine bar, so I am sure that I will have a glass or 10!  ha! 

Hope this finds everyone well! 

Quick update on the kids:
Elli had her post-op with Dr. Som (who I secretly have a crush on:) and everything went great!  She did so well throughout the process.
Hank is saying more words everyday and he will be switching school from one full day to 2 half days a week starting next week.  He is still in the Infants and Toddlers program and he is improving everyday.
Jake is ALMOST walking...he has taken a few steps, but it hasn't been more than 3 or 4.  I'm not in a rush for him to start walking...

Alright, talk to you soon!

Jake

I feel bad sometimes that I don't talk more about Jake.  He is just such a great baby, I am so blessed.  He is always so happy, goes to bed and takes naps with no problems.  He is my least high maintenance child right now.  He is almost walking...he has been cruising the furniture a bit more, but still doesn't want to walk.  Elli and Hank love him...probably too much when they squeeze him for hugs!  He has a total of 3 teeth, but 2 more are coming in.

We turned his car seat around this past weekend and he LOVES looking forward and playing with Elli and Hank and watching the movies in the car.  It's amazing how one little thing can make a difference on a baby!

Anyway, I just wanted to give Jake a little shout out!  Thanks for being such a wonderful baby....he makes me want to have another one:) 

Reunion, Anniversary, and Elli's surgery

First, the reunion was the weekend of September 11th. It was SO awesome to see everyone! I keep in touch with most on Facebook, but it was also nice to catch up with those not on FB. All of the women of our class look better than I remember they did at school, and I am not exaggerating. Everyone seemed so happy and that makes me happy. The whole reunion was a HUGE success thanks to the whole committee, Lauren and John. What a fabulous time! My voice is still recovering after a week...

Friday night, we had an event at the Fleet Reserve Club. The event ended around 10pm and we should have gone home....but instead, I wanted to go to O'Brien's, then Acme, and then to top it off we went to Mangia (not WW friendly) and got pizza. All i remember is Jonnie Iadonisi coming out with handfuls of pizza. We got into a cab and went home. The poor cab driver had no idea how far he had to drive. He was probably annoyed.

We used a new sitter for Thursday and Friday. We found her on Sittercity and have been really pleased. She lives close and the kids love her.

We just celebrated 4 years of marriage on Thursday. Crazy how time flies. The 4th Anniversary Gift was Fruit and Flowers. So, I found Georgetown cupcakes for Daniel - they came with little flowers on them, then I gave him a candy apple for the fruit - anyone that knows Daniel knows how he loves sweets. He brought me home some beautiful flowers and we went to The Palm in DC for dinner. It was so good.

Elli had surgery yesterday to take out her tonsils and adenoids. The surgery only took about 30 minutes and we were home around noon yesterday. It was a long day though...she doesn't like the taste of the pain medication...so I am going to try and take it back to the pharmacy to get them to flavor it some more....hopefully that helps it taste a little better. I had to laugh last night, because Elli was running away from me saying, "it's not tasty." I couldn't help but laugh.
She will not be at school this week....because she is supposed to rest. After about a week to ten days she should be back to normal...

Today, Elli and I will be hanging at home while the boys go to a few birthday parties. I will be working on all the last minute details for Siobhan's shower and also for the boy's birthday party. I just got the favor tags, waterbottle labels, and cupcake tags for the Farm Animal themed birthday party!!! Should be interesting. Now, I just need to get the cake made...

Hope everyone has a great weekend.